*puts on cutest lingerie*

*snapchats girl friend a nude*

*turns up speakers: PCD’s i don’t need a man plays*


why iphones gotta take two million years to turn back on after they die like you plug em in and you’re all ready to start texting again but they’re like “nope. i gotta take some time for myself. figure out who i am. you hurt me too much the last time. let me think.”